Liar Liar

I called in sick to work yesterday. But I wasn't sick. I lied.

After my root canal, I was not done with all the required dental work. I need a post and core and then a crown. I got my post and cord and then I was told I need a crown lengthening. The dentist did a horrific job of explaining the procedure to me. "Will it hurt?" I asked him. "No, no, you'll be fine. Standard procedure." Fine, no big deal, I thought.

Now, WG2 has enforced a strict policy that I am not allowed to visit websites like WebMD. I'm a bit of hypochondriac. But since WG2 moved halfway across the country, she is unable to jump across the living room and grab my laptop out of my hands when I say something like "omigod, I think I have malaria," I Googled crown lengthening.

I read about the procedure, the recovery and the complications. It was right between the recovery and the complications that I felt faint and began to sweat. I found a health message board and a woman posted a message asking if a crown lengthening was necessary. Several posters wrote back that they were told by one dentist that they need the procedure and then by another that you don't. It was then that I started crying.

After calling my mother and telling her that I'm never going to the dentist again because they scared me. To comfort me, she scheduled me an appointment with my dentist from high school. On a Monday. My dentist from high school is in New Jersey. And I'm not talking close to the city, hop a train Jersey. I'm talking close to Pennsylvania, take a bus because no trains go there Jersey.

I didn't want to waste a personal day travelling to New Jersey and going to my dentist so I planned to call in sick. My catholic school guilt set in immediately and I hadn't even done anything. All week I contemplated just taking the personal day. Or just giving one my bosses a heads up that I'd be calling in sick cause maybe she'd be ok with it? Yeah, I didn't really think so either.

I made my way to New Jersey on Saturday and spent the weekend with my Mom. Monday morning, my alarm went off at 7:30, per usual. I went to the guest room and turned on my mom's desktop. It took a million years to turn on and a million more for my Webmail to load. I drafted my email, told my bosses I had felt sick all night and didn't feel any better in the morning. They both wrote back to feel better.

Today, they both asked me if I felt better. I felt awful. So guilty. I looked fine, not like I was recovering from any sort of illness. I felt like a nun was going to crawl from under my desk and slap my knuckles with a ruler. I told them I felt better and that was that.

As bad as I felt, the calling in sick was totally worth it. I didn't waste a personal day. And I don't need a crown lengthening. In fact, I don't even need a crown. But if I ever want to do this again, I'm going to need a more convincing excuse.