Rolling Out the Welcome Mat - New Hires and Old Nonsense

Advertising Working Girl chronicled the progression from new-hire to confident team member on Tuesday and coincidentally, I was just pondering, perhaps lamenting, about the trials and tribulations of being on the other side of that coin: dealing with new coworkers.

We generally scramble a few days ahead of time to pull together a training schedule then lay out some stale bagels for the "eat and meet" and put on our best "Welcome to Hell" smiles when they arrive for their first day.

There's nothing compared to the feeling of assisting someone take their first unsure steps into the culture of a new company home while knowing all the while that in a few short months, they'll likely be gone, crushed under the weight of so much disorganization and political squabbling.

Regardless, new hires all have one thing in common, no matter what level of degree they hold, no matter whether they're coming in from a Fortune 500 or picking up a part time shift to meet ends, they don't know a thing! They're like babies in a way and must be shown absolutely everything. No one walks in off the street knowing where the copier is or what printer their documents are going to. They have no clue when to go to lunch or how to find the CEO's office. Sure, you've done email before but you need to be shown how we do email. Being a new hire is definitely a humbling experience, regardless whether it lasts a week or six months.

They also all seem to exude this rather contagious brand of promise and positivity that, no matter how toxic the environment was prior to their arrival, for a few fleeting moments, it becomes hard to resist.